femininity.

(Me, rocking out to music from Glee. And, yes. My legs are actually that white.

Feel free to tease...I'm a practically an albino.)

Whew. I've been completely swallowed up by work projects and nearly living at the office (including one 17 hour day...and one all nighter) and, yet since the peanut-butter sandwich episode of a few days ago I have been so very surprisingly happy. This, I suppose, is a little signal from above that the right decision was made, and that I will be completely and wonderfully okay just being Bethany. Yet, in my spare moments, I have again allowed shopping to occupy my time. Not buying so much...just trying on and oogling. Well, with a few responsible purchases.

My sis and I indulged in a little shopping last night, and this black and purple combo caught my eye. Infinite thanks to my sister who pushed me to buy this lovely number...and who also stomached my excited bra and panty dance in the changing room (only the truly resilient recover from that frightening sight). When something as silly as an inexpensive ruffled cami or a brand spanking new dress can make me feel as though I'm entirely and fully a new woman...I cannot control myself! The item must be purchased!

Hmm...that sounds like something only a shopaholic would say. I mean, I needed this dress. Um, I have a thing. You know, a swanky event...new dress required. (That is a lie.) :)

goodbye peanut butter. love, jelly.

Gabe moved today. He left without saying goodbye. So I don't have a lot of words, which is quite strange for me. (You are all breathing sighs of relief, I'm sure...for once, something has hushed me up!) But, I did take time to harvest my emotion by molding jelly into the shape of a heart, and indulging in a silly photoshoot with my peanut butter sandwich.

What can I say? I'm such an emotionally healthy individual. :)

falling away.

Dear Fall,
You're slipping away so quickly, and all too soon I've found myself in a world of leaf-barren trees and frosty windshields! Please don't go away just yet...I feel I've barely had time to carve pumpkins, crunch through fallen leaves and indulge in your crisp temps. You are so very lovable, and all I'm asking is to love you a little while longer before wintry chills and swirly, whirly, twirly white flakes whisk you away for good. :)

All my love,
Me

P.S. How are you all? I've been terribly absent from blogland, knee-deep in homework and housekeeping...but can't wait to make my reading rounds and catch up on each and every one of your beautiful worlds. :)

why i will miss him.

(It has snowed twice this week...and so this photo may be my very last of fall folliage 2009. Consider me heartbroken!)

Late yesterday evening, Gabe and I made a trip to the grocery store so he could pick up something to make for dinner. After staring blankly into the frosty doors of frozen goods, checking cook times and peeking at his watch, Gabe finally speaks:

Gabe: "I really want to make a lasagna. But it has to be baked."

Me: "You should totally just microwave it. It's late."

Gabe: "No. It has to be baked."

Me (witchily snatching icy lasagna block from his hands): "Gaberdoodle. This one takes an hour and forty five minutes to bake. That means you won't be putting noodles in your mouth until 10pm."

Gabe: "Fine. You don't get to play 'Lasagna' with me."

Me: "Um...did you just say "play 'Lasagna'"?"

Gabe: (defensively) "Yes. Playing lasagna is when we buy frozen lasagna, bake it in an oven and then eat it with Ned (our kitten) like a happy family."

Just one of the millions of reasons why, in a few weeks, I will miss him terribly. My funny bone will probably dust up and crumble into a thousand little pieces.

float away.

(Two of my favorites: leaves and puddles.)

I absolutely cannot believe that the weekend has come and gone. And at midnight on Sunday night, it isn't looking like my real "To-Do's" got completed...

The Completed Items:

• Open all the windows and snuggle up in the crisp chill. Sleep in--twice.
• Flip through September's issue of Lucky. Curse body type for looking like a lumberjack in oh-so-fashion forward plaid.
• Catch a baseball game on TV, make concerted effort to watch and follow along. Wind up falling asleep. Pride self on effort, regardless.
• Cuddle brand new little kitten at the humane society...fall in love, dream of adopting him and naming him Xander. Recall crushing reality that I live in a "no pets" apartment. Return little kitten to lonely wire cage.
• Sneak in a little birthday shopping for my mom. End up shopping for self...decide this probably makes me a terrible, ego-centric person. Blame it all on the fabulous sales.
• Share a glass of Honeycrisp wine with my sis, laugh uproariously at old episodes of The Office.
• Spend the afternoon with fam + Gabe + cousin Chad for annual fall jaunt to a gorgeous local state park. Catch these three perfect leaves bathing in a parking lot puddle.

Items Not Completed (or, truthfully, attempted in the least...):

• Wash and dry frighteningly massive pile of dirty dishes. Ew.
• Put pencil to paper--finish two drawings for class. (Do not leave this until the night before...)
• Clean out scary, scary fridge.
• Catch up on 3+ hours of reading for class-take online quizzes and participate in discussion forum.
• Wade through ginormous laundry pile, wash the filth...rid drawers and closet of the unwanted.
• Visit the gym. At least once. (Wince. Epic fail.)

I will surely pay for all this "undone" later...but, oh, what a lovely weekend of procrastination. :)

the {not so} near and {oh so} dear.

(My friend Andrea on the right, and me on the left. Totally jacked this photo from A's Facebook this AM. Hope she doesn't mind...I also whitened my teeth, because I'm vain like that.)

Last night was incredible, and exactly what I needed. My Washingtonian friend since Kindergarten, Andrea, popped home to visit a sick family member, and I was lucky enough to snag her Friday night. We caught up, chatting at breakneck speeds over dinner at Shanghai Bistro, where moody live jazz was playing. The place is so contemporary, which is fun for us...because, let's face it: Eau Claire, Wisconsin isn't exactly burgeoning with cosmopolitan-esque eateries. Then, after a conversation about exactly how YOUNG college students look, we decided to scope out a local band--the Laarks at the University. (The Laarks are quite good. Think Death Cab.) We felt so very old--but totally dug watching the awkward teens get their dance on.

It's remarkable what an evening with a soul sister can do to your heart. We've got a very solid 18 years of close friendship behind our belts, and I always feel like she's a person who can read my heart and mind. Andrea has an amazingly beautiful soul. A girl who is so real, so thoughtful and so compassionate. She's the girl who never forgets a birthday, an inside joke or that one time geeky Kevin Rezarch microwaved a twisty tie in 1st grade and nearly smoked us all out of the lunchroom. (Confession: I. Loved. Kevin Rezarch.) Someone who constantly seeks meaning, love and connections in everything around her. Not to mention she's quite hilarious... :)

Somehow--blessedly--I struck the friend jackpot when I was young. Although those dearest to me are not geographically the nearest to me, they are the ones who bring so much fulfillment and joy in ways that I feel no one else will ever hold a candle to. (Ooo. I know it's bad to leave "to" at the end of a sentence, but not quite sure how to restructure this one. So sorry grammar nerds.)

Very happy weekending to you! :)

it's the little things.

(I snapped this photo several weeks ago at Vino, an incredible local venue. It is an absolute must if you're in the area!)

Today was such a lovely mosaic of moments that left me feeling so warm and fuzzy...and on this frigid and drizzly 40 degree day, a little warmth went a long way! I'm still feeling sunshiney and thankful for...

...a blessed fire alarm that saved me from the last frustratingly uninspired 30 minutes of art class.

...sneaking in a snuggly afternoon nap in my favorite sweatshirt.

...an impromptu pasta dinner with two good friends and a co-worker resulting in near tears-down-face laughter. So heart healthy. (The laughs, not necessarily the pasta...)

...good news about what could have been a scary situation involving a family member's health.

...flirtation. (Or maybe it isn't? Ack. I don't know. What am I, a mind reader?)

...a fabulous stack of second-hand magazines from my boss, which I plan to devour tonight.

...the sweet woman at Old Navy who never fails to remember my name. (I picked up this sweater in aqua, which seemed like a great idea at time...but now I'm unsure. Too grandma-ish? Grandma-chic? Just plain chic? Help!)

...getting to look forward to a little Friday night date with an old friend.

Hope your Thursday was just as toasty and wonderful. :)

the quickest way to my heart...

...is through an apple orchard on a crisp fall day. There was finally a chill in the air today--cool enough to allow me to flirt heavily with the idea of donning a long-sleeved cardigan and shimmying up some trees in search of the perfect apple.

A friend also had the day free from work, so he and I headed off to the orchard. The Eau Claire Orchard is closest to us, offers the most kitsch (think...apple slinging, corn maze) and allows you to pick your own straight from the tree. Naturally it was our orchard of choice. As we pulled up, a cheery sign greeted us, "Pick your own Honeycrisp apples!". Love Honeycrisp, love picking my own. Love life.

But, oh, how quickly the tables turned when we stepped inside the barn and up to the counter to pay for the peck we were hoping to pick. It went a little something...like this:

Me: Hi, there...how are you?

Employee: Good. Are you ready to check out?

Me: We're actually looking to pick our own, today.

Employee: Umm...yeah.
Me: Hmm? Is that okay?
Employee: (Exasperated sigh.) Everyone always comes in wanting to pick their own. It's like--I have a whole store here of perfectly picked apples. And then they whine and complain that there's nothing out on the trees, cause they only want to walk about two rows in. It's like, no. Everything's picked over because it was just the weekend. Come back on Saturday...(Tirade continues.)

Me: (Meekly shrinking away from the counter.) We'll...go somewhere else...

I moved quickly for the door, all the while trying desperately not to meet my pal's glances for fear that I would come unglued and LOSE IT right there in that seemingly sweet little autumnal barn.

The two of us...barely made it out alive. The second we burst through the doors, he and I ERUPTED with giggles, impressions and what-we-should-have-said-isms. His response was by far my favorite: "Hmm. Didn't know life on the apple orchard could be so darn tough..."

We spent the next two hours driving through the back hills, stopping so I could snap photos of picturesque pastures and popping in to various orchards to see if they allowed self-pick...to no absolutely avail. A friendly woman turned us on to a little orchard called Nibbletts (Nibbletts. For real. And yes...I giggled at that, too.) where pick-your-own is the only way, but unfortunately they were closed for the day.

Regardless, it was a wonderful day that will not soon be forgotten...but I can't help but feel slightly disappointed at the day's lack of apple picking. Is picking your own apples really that taboo? I have so many memories of trips to the orchard as a child, but is it becoming a thing of the past...something my (very, very future) children will never, ever believe we paid to do?